"Psst...Hey buddy, want to buy a baseball team?" "Say, aren't you....that big gun with Wal Mart and trucks and all that? You own a baseball team? Major league?"
"Sure do, and it is for sale...cheap." "What would I be getting?" "You would be getting the works! Big city downtown stadium with AIR CONDITIONING and a sliding roof. If it rains you stay dry! There is also a near full-size train that whistles and runs on a track when the home team hits a home run." "A real engine? Is it worn out?" " Far from it! It has hardly been used the last several years. It is like new, man. A real engine inside the ball park! "
"What about the team? How are they doing?" "Well they are in a bit of a slump, but they will snap out of that any day now. Fine pitching staff. Some great young players. A really good-looking team."
" Where are they in the standings?" "Well they have slipped down to last place." "How far down are they?" "I think they are ten games out, but there is a lot of the season left." "Yes, but at that rate wouldn't they be about 35 games out at the end of the season?" "Hey, let's not get caught up in stats. These folks love baseball. They come to the park for hot dogs and beer and a good time. Winning isn't all there is to life."
"What kind of money are we talking about to buy this team?" "Tell you what. I will make you a deal you can't refuse! For about 650 mil you can have the stadium and train and team and I will throw in a great young minor league team and new stadium down on the coast! You can't beat that!"
"How are they doing...that team down on the coast?" "They have slipped down a bit since the start of the season, but have a lot of great young players and a fine staff of pitchers. You ought to see their stadium. It is awesome!"
"Where are they in the standings?" "I think they might be in last place right now, but there is a lot of season left. Those folks down there love their baseball. They fill that place almost every night. Great hot dogs. Made from Nolan Ryan beef!"
"Sounds like they could use Nolan Ryan along with the dogs!"
"Funny! Ha. Ha. He is busy with the Texas Rangers right now. Say what about it? Want to grab this deal while it is hot? It won't be out there long. It isn't every day you can buy a Major League baseball team."
"Ummmm. I don't know. I need to talk to the little lady."
"You need to get permission from your wife????"
"Yeah. You see it's HER MONEY!"
"Be sure and tell her about the women's powder room. It is beautiful!"
